markyjoe1990: (Default)
I'm not a popular Youtuber. However, four-thousand subs is still a fairly big fan base. What's nice about it is that sometimes you meet interesting fans that treat you with respect and sincerity. When I come across these fans, I often become fast friends with them. Perhaps because most of them are adults (according to my Youtube analytics), most of my fans seem pretty well put together.

Something that has fueled my dislike of teenagers however - besides a very troublesome childhood, and a teenager's terrible taste and tendency to conform rather than deviate - is that most of the annoying, entitled, disingenuous fans that randomly add me on Skype are around 13 - 15 years old. These whiny little brats are the worst.

Despite my anxieties and dislike of people, I have a lot of patience. To give an example, sometimes a fan will ask for help with Fire Emblem hacking, I will personally add them on Skype and teach them through screen sharing and mic chat.

However, I've met enough fans that I can figure out when they are the type to put me on a pedestal rather than treat me like an actual human being. The friendship they allegedly try to form between us always progresses in the same way. The conversations are one-sided, and any comments they make are praise and worship. After the first talk, they rarely speak to me again. Sometimes, they will only start conversations just so I can help them learn Fire Emblem hacking, even when I have created numerous tutorials and integrated a brand new section to my website dedicated to learning and obtaining the tools for Fire Emblem hacking. And you know what? I get sick of it. Eventually I lose my patience and size them up for the brown nosing phony they are and this always happens: "I'm so sorry! I didn't mean to make you feel so angry with me! I know you don't like it when people praise you, but you are like a god to me! Please forgive me!"

From there, I have pretty much confirmed that we will never see each other as equals, and give up.
markyjoe1990: (Default)
I recorded Chapter 5 of Midnight Sun nearly a week ago, and yet it took today for me to finally start editing it. It's not like I've been doing much else with my week besides working, so why did it take so long?

I spoke with my friend Alfred Kamon - creator of Midnight Sun - and he says that perhaps the reason why I haven't been productive is because I'm always stressed out. Sounds about right.

Crazy women, bills, and anxiety )

Hopefully this will all change soon. I recently applied to Costco. I have over a year's worth of experience at this discount store, with managers that are supportive and like me, so I believe my chances at getting this job are pretty high. Not gonna hold my breath though.

Additionally, I plan to get out of my current Youtube Partnership in favor of one that appears to be a lot better, but I have to wait for my current contract to end. That happens in about one more year. When that happens, I'll at least be making more money on my channel. Nothing to live off of, but anything helps.

Mm... I'm sure this will all pass at some point. Maybe next week will be better.
markyjoe1990: (Default)
Working at a discount store isn't too bad. The pay is garbage, but the demands placed on you are simple. Bring customer-misplaced items to their appropriate area in the store, bring the boxes left by the big truck to the correct area in the stock room, restock items in the front, keep the store clean and tidy, help customers find things, ring up customers at the register. Easy peasy, right?

One problem. The job will make you hate humanity.

In this store, I have met some of the most arrogant, selfish, insecure, impatient, cheap, and oblivious people I have ever seen. My childhood and teenage years had quite a bit of trauma that resulted in my misanthropy, but as those fires started to dim with age, this place came in with some new logs.

Four Kinds Of Jerks )


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